Somersault

So. While searching through Amazon.com, I came across a fellow who had expensive and classy taste. And when I say expensive, I mean expensive. His name: Eric Mananimal. Oh and this classy man from Washington is most definitely a "mananimal"
Please, do not confuse Eric Mananimal with Humanimal. Humanimal is a crazy man who dresses up in body paint and makes himself look like an animal. Come on, Eric Mananimal is way more classy than that. Though, Humanimal is pretty brawny and built... if you can get past the fact that he is currently dressed as a dog.

But anyway, so let's take a look at the items Mr. Eric Mananimal has purchased and commented on on Amazon.
Ok, ok. Ukulele. Earrings. Necklace. Not bad. Pretty normal...

$ 937,040.00 DIAMOND! ONLY TWO FREAKING STARS!
$91,917.82 WATCH! ONLY THREE STARS?!
and shoes. eh. old man's shoes.
Oh Mr. Mananimal.

Let's now take a closer look at his ratings.

The diamond. If you cannot read the picture below, then I will read it for you: "This diamond is ok. It's pretty big but c'mon amazon. I have amazon prime so I get free shipping but how am I supposed to get this thing gift wrapped? I have a personal rule, no diamonds under $500k go in gift bags. What am I supposed to do? Buy a paper and wrap it in the funny pages? I don't even know how to do that. I would buy this diamond again and again if I could have it gift wrapped but as it is now? no thanks."

Then Jason Pruitt says "Yeah, I agree, I bought myself a grill consisting of nothing but this diamond...the only cheap point I see in the diamond though- is the fact that it comes in the form on 8 one carat diamonds taped together. come on amazon...fix this."

Then Kathryn Jewell Shaw says "I completely agree. Just because I bought 8 of them for my wife doesn't hide the fact that no gift wrap makes for a cheap gift. Very, very disappointed."

What about the watch? It certainly wasn't up to the Mananimal's standards.

Mananimal: "Pros: It looks neat, the band is comfortable and it keeps time almost as accurately as my cell phone. Cons: no calculator. All in all, I prefer my Casio calculator watch, but this one is good too."

JPV responds: "Actually, you'll be disappointed: Your cell phone keeps better time than this watch. However, that's not why one buys a watch like this, is it?"

What could ever please Eric Mananimal? Is anything worthy of his five star vote?!

Why yes. Yes there is. Naturally, Mananimal would give a tiger t-shirt he purchased a five star rating. I told you he had classy taste.

So I will leave you with the question that is on everybody's mind: Eric Mananimal, who are you?!

Phobia of the Day: Scopophobia – fear of being looked at or stared at.

Fact of the Day: Adolf Hitler was Time Magazine’s Man of the Year for 1938.